Okay, nothing like almost running off the road in the rain to convince somebody's PSYCHO BROTHER to stop and get some sleep.

I slept for a while, but now I'm awake. One of the windows in this crappy motel won't close completely, and there's a draft right across my bed. That's not really a bad thing, though. When I was a little kid, I used to like sleeping with the windows open, so I could smell the rain.

I can smell it now. It makes me feel - this sounds stupid, but no one's going to read it - safe, I guess. Little-kid safe.

I never really thought about it, but I always did feel safe as a kid, even as dangerous as I guess our life must have been. Dean and Dad made me feel like nothing was ever going to hurt me.

I wonder what it was like for them.

The last demon we exorcised - he, it, talked about that. Childhood stuff, I mean. A lot. Told me - well, I'm not going to write it down. Bad things. And the worst part is, it's all in my head now, and I can't get rid of it. Well, I guess it was there all along, but the demon dredged it up. I hate that, the way they get under your skin. Hunting them isn't like hunting anything else. They know how to push your buttons. How to make you hurt and doubt and hate each other.

I think that's why Dean's so fucked up right now. He's listening to them a little too much.